PreviousTopIndexNext
RUTHLESS

Once I thought I was right and others were wrong
It caused me to do foolish things
And sometimes, put myself in the path of dangerous people.
I was not smart that way
It did not make me happy.
I will tell you a story about that time
A time when my fear masqueraded as self righteousness.
I was listening to a woman who paid dues to the god of exaggeration
She was always exaggerating
It made her happy. It was her truth. I knew this.
But this time, it fed that part of me
The part that thought
I am right
Others are wrong
And I thought my fear disguised as self righteousness would protect me
I was not – street smart, that way
And so – I put myself in the path of another woman
Who thought, violence is the answer
To all questions
She beat me once
In a rage
I had never been beaten before
But it was not the first time I had fooled around, that way
She tried to strangle me
Then pushed me to the ground – twice
My head snapping back against a brick in her yard
Her brick – her rightness – her time.
Then she had the sheriff arrest me for trespassing
It made her happy
Happy to beat me
That’s why,
When people ask me,
Don’t you want to be happy?
I say,
no

Laura Randolph


Peace Buzz
47
PreviousTopIndexNext